STUBBORN and RIDGID is how one reacts when another has asked TOO MUCH of them in childhood when they were too small and dependent to refuse unreasonable demands placed on their body and psyche. As an infant or child, how would you enjoy being responsible for “MAKING” a miserable unhappy adult, feel valuable or happy? Stubbornness
Being the one BLAMED for everything wrong in the adult’s life.
Being the one forced to be the adult’s friend and confidant?
Being the adult’s emotional and sexual support or interest?
The neediness and demands of one’s caregiver is overwhelming and the child fears, “the bottomless pit of NEEDINESS” will consume them. Never mind the FACT that you CAN’T make another happy.
Stubbornness or dissociation is the main defense mechanism available to a small dependent one asked to do things it is NOT possible to do for another. Their caregiver needed / expected / demanded the child to comfort, support and be the loyal friend, to the unhappy adult. Instead of the child, being cared for and honored, as an independent developing individual, the child was put in a position of needing to “prop up and support” the dysfunctional adult(s) in order to stay alive.
To protect “the self” the child learned to hide their vulnerabilities, became secretive and “withheld” (was truly unable to give) what the unreasonable adult, wanted. Rigid stubbornness and withholding is a coping mechanism, or “power play” of survival in an abusive relationship. The “adult child” considers all relationships as a game of survival and outsmarting the needy predator. Some call the game of codependency “loving each other.” The child gets stuck in a thought pattern or cycle, they are not consciously aware of and mistakenly believes all close relationships function the same way. This tradition gets handed down to the next generation.
ONLY, when you are conscious of all the roles you play in that cycle, will you have the CHOICE to change your thinking. Own the truth that the only one that can make you happy is you. You are a sovereign essence, stream of consciousness and your own creator. This is why, in the quantum field there is the “law of allowing” and why the dark bandwidth of thought is quarantined!
Quantum law of ALLOWING is you stop trying to get others to adopt your reality, beliefs, and resonance or carry your pain and suffering. Allowing grants each individual the right to have their own reality and resonance and to BE and DO whatever they choose. Violating the rights and choices of others or destroying any part of the collective environment, drops you out of compassion and into a lower resonance.
Law of allowing in the light quantum field ONLY has high consciousness; all thoughts are compassionate and allow.
Law of allowing in the dark bandwidth, you try to avoid interacting with Dark Ones, especially dark family members. When Dark Ones cross boundaries or boarders you and others need to stand in your truth and keep your electromagnetic field closed to them. Be firm, use nonviolence and expose lies and distortions. YOU CANNOT FIX Dark Ones or their agendas, they need to do that for themself, just like you need to do it for yourself.